The late singer, John Denver, wrote and sang a song called, “Rocky Mountain High.” This tune was very popular from the start and I still hear it almost daily on Sirius channel 7.
I’ve been to Colorado numerous times, but fortunately or unfortunately, depending on how you look at things, never experienced a Rocky Mountain high, that is, unless having shortness of breath in Colorado Springs is the same. Just climbing a set of stairs there had my heart thumping. Here in Arizona, a pumpkin spice high is another story.
Fall’s in the air, and it’s that time of year again throughout the country for pumpkin spice goodies. English muffins, coffee creamer, cookies, cheesecake, body lotion, coffee, beer, pancakes, cereal, doggie treats, donuts, you name it. Perhaps I’m over exaggerating, but it seems come September or October, most every food product has a pumpkin spice label on it.
I crave the pumpkin spiced donuts. If I eat two or three of the small glazed ones, a slight buzz is felt from the natural sugar. It doesn’t last if I’m doing something physical, or have plenty of liquid to wash things down. I’d hate to be an office worker sitting at a desk eating the same, one after another.
Perhaps the top pumpkin drink of all, at least for gals, is a pumpkin spice latte or frappe. A bit too spendy for my wife on an everyday basis—she opts for Nestlé Coffee mate, sugar-free pumpkin spice creamer, poured into a cup of freshly ground, steaming hot, Colombian grown coffee. Joleen has a special porcelain mug that she likes to sip out of given to her by a good friend.
This particular coffee seems to meld with the pumpkin spice creamer better than most, perhaps because it’s mountain grown. National Association of Colombian Coffee Growers Federation spokesperson, Juan Valdez, claims that coffee beans from his country are the best, and who am I to dispute this acclaimed expert.
Off the record, I’d say that Hawaiian grown coffee is just as savory to the pallet, yet please don’t let Señor Valdez or the Colombian coffee cartel know that I said so.
My favorite holiday drink is a peppermint mocha. I like those from the trendy espresso stands as well, but once again, generally opt for the poor man special, which is a cup of hot chocolate with a peppermint stick dropped inside. A word of caution: You want the peppermint stick to completely melt or risk having it lodge in your throat like it once did mine.
There’s a segment from a popular childhood limerick that young children often repeat, accredited to acclaimed English poet, Robert Southey, which sums up best the love most women feel for pumpkin spice. I tweaked it a bit just in case you notice something different.
“What are little girls made of?
Sugar, pumpkin spice,
and everything nice.
That’s what little girls are made of.”
I suppose there are some feminists and woke advocates that despise Southey’s poem, and to them I’d say, “Chill my friends.” These easily offended folks can veg by opting for a frigidly cold, iced to the brim, pumpkin spice Macchiato, contained within an environmentally friendly, recycled paper cup.
For those tough men and women enjoying their brew from a stainless steel thermos, Nestlé Coffee mate makes pumpkin spice creamer in powdered form. Carry a carton in your truck or car, and you’re off to the races each time you feel the need for a little extra flavoring.
For those on a tight budget, toss some cubes of ice into a blender along with 32 ounces of Juan Valdez’s coffee, and just enough pumpkin spice creamer to sweeten things up. For a touch of elegance, add a squirt of Reddi-wip whipped cream to your cup or glass afterwards, but don’t over do it. Save a squirt or two for that oven fresh, Sara Lee pumpkin pie in the fridge.
It’s now a perfect opportunity to sit back and enjoy, while at the same time, toast Juan Valdez and his surefooted workers for the excellent coffee beans they harvest, Robert Southey for his insightful limerick, dairy cows for their milk used to make coffee creamer, and especially those hard working, pumpkin-spice-farmers around the world. Without these nameless people, it’d be just another bland cup of joe held in your hand.
You can even go one step further. Next time you visit one of the upscale coffee shacks, purchase one of their reusable coffee tumblers with business name printed on the side. Pour your homebrew into it each morning, and co-workers will never know that you didn’t hit a drive-thru on the way to work.
With the money saved by doing so, you can easily afford to bring three dozen of my favorite donuts into the office, and give your boss and colleagues a pumpkin spice high they’ll never forget!
I like to write junk... 