FASHIONABLY LATE

After turning 70, I don’t like being rushed, because when this happens, I generally do something stupid, like forget my wallet or important paperwork for a doctor’s appointment.

My wife has been using a familiar term ever since we met, most likely hailing from her midwestern background. Being born and raised in Kansas. Joleen uses it a lot when I’m ready to go somewhere, and she’s not, which is often.

“Hold your horses” means slow down, wait, or be patient—especially when someone is acting too quickly or getting ahead of themselves. The phrase dates to the days when horses were a major mode of transportation. If a driver or rider needed to stop or slow a team of horses, they would literally hold the reins to keep the horses under control.

Over time, it became a figurative expression meaning “don’t rush.” It has been used in English since at least the 1800s, and it became common in everyday speech in the United States, especially with the influence of horse-drawn travel and later Western/cowboy culture.

“Cool your jets!” is the expression I often use. The phrase comes from the jet age, when jet engines became familiar symbols of speed, power, and urgency. To cool your jets suggests reducing the heat, thrust, or intensity—basically, take your foot off the ‘hurry pedal.’

It likely became common in American English in the mid-20th century, especially as airplanes, rockets, and jet propulsion became part of everyday imagination after World War II and into the space-race era.

“Take a chill pill” is another way to tell someone to ease off. Historically, it’s a much newer phrase than “Hold your horses.” It seems to have become popular in American slang in the 1980s and 1990s, especially among younger speakers.

The phrase plays on the idea of taking a pill to change your mood—like a tranquilizer or anti-anxiety medication—but it is usually not meant literally. Instead, chill comes from slang meaning relaxed, calm, or easygoing, and pill gives the phrase a humorous, exaggerated sound.

It also fits the pop-culture language of that era, when people said things like chill out, take it easy, and relax. “Take a chill pill” is basically a more playful version of “Calm down.” Because of the pill image, it can sound a little cheekier than “Cool your jets” or “Hold your horses.”

All of this brings me to, “What’s the big hurry?” Ultimately, that’s the question I ask myself each time I get ready to go somewhere. Being ‘fashionably late’ is accepted among the Hollywood and elitist crowd, and the expression generally means arriving a little after the stated time, not so late that it becomes rude or disruptive, but late enough to appear relaxed, confident, or socially in demand.

In social circles, arriving after things are underway can draw more attention, especially in church. There was an older couple at a church who were fashionably late almost every Sunday. I believe it was to show off the wife’s new hat as she wore a different one each service. The woman definitely knew how to pick them.

I’ve yet to arrive at a doctor’s appointment late, but there’s bound to be a time when I do. My big question here is, “Do I sashay when I enter the waiting room?” For those not knowing what sashay is, it means to walk in a confident, noticeable, and sometimes exaggerated way, often with a bit of style, flair, or attitude.

When someone sashays into a room, they are not simply walking in quietly; they are moving as if they know people may be watching, often with a smooth, swaying motion that can make the entrance seem playful, dramatic, or self-assured. It’s too bad Mrs. Humphrey isn’t around to teach me.